I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
