I cockslap morals
i just google imaged poop.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I think I have vodka in my lungs
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
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