You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
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