fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
