How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize