Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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