Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
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