Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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