You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
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