just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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