So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
It all started with a game of naked twister.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize
