Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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