When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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