this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
smell my finger.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
