I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
you didnt know i had herpes?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
