Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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