Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize