Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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