so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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