I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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