honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Randomize
