Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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