So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
