my mouth tastes like poor choices
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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