There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
