and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
