So drunk its hurt
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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