whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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