This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize