Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize