office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize
