Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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