Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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