Those balls look pretty dangerous.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
