who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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