i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
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