is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Blood and glitter go together right?
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
