I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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