Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
