I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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