i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
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