covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
We don't watch enough power rangers
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Randomize