He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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