...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize