it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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