How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
