i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Randomize
