Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
