hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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