So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
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